Saturday, August 13, 2005

Oompa Loompa Imposter Outed

US citizen Ezzy Dame, 57, 3'11" tall, has been claiming for thirty years to have played an Oompa Loompa in the 1971 movie, "Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory." His little charade came to a crashing halt when Rusty Goffe of England unveiled him as an imposter. Says Goffe:

"There were only 10 original Oompa Loompas. Six English guys, one English girl, one Turkish, one Maltese and one German. Unfortunately, six of them are now dead. And the girl is in a retirement home here in England. She is very old and now blind so I do like to keep her privacy. All are in poor health. I hope you understand. I guess Ezzy is a nice guy, but we have to be loyal and truthful to the fans."
Dame confessed to the hoax, saying his agent had talked him into padding his resume to get work. Acting parts for little people were scarce to come by. Once he made his boast, he had to spin an entire web of lies to maintain appearances.

This is the first case of a phony Oompa Loompa uncovered in America. Authorities refused to speculate on how many fraudulent Oompa Loompas are at large.

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